You have heard or read the stories about divorce rates, but did you know that the divorce rate for second marriages is higher than the first? Whether you are divorced, or have lost your first love, it is important to wait for that second marriage.
In a perfect world, we would marry one-time and live with that person until we grow old and die. However, we know that is not the truth, but a fairy tale to many. The truth is, that we live in a world today where people die young, and others marry too fast, causing a high divorce rate.
So before you consider that second marriage, take some time to reevaluate you! No matter the circumstance, it is best for you to understand who you truly are before committing to someone else. Consider these tidbits:
- Independence – often times independence is lost or diminished during marriage. You often forget what it is like to be independent and care for yourself in every way. Take some time to rediscover your independence. Make your own decisions – good and bad – and pave a way that is best for you. Discover what makes you happy!
- Goals – goals can be lost during a bad marriage, bad divorce, or when losing a loved one. It can be difficult to get the fire back to go after those dreams and goals. However, you MUST. It is important for you to take the time to write down those goals you may have put aside during your first marriage for a number of reasons. Now is the time to realize those dreams and achieve those goals.
- Family – spend time with family. A second marriage can wreak havoc on families. Make sure that you take the time to appreciate your family, children, and parents. Strengthen these relationships before jumping into another marriage. You need these people in your life.
- You – Simply put, take time for you. Take control of your life, find yourself again, and do what it takes to get you back to loving yourself. Do not jump into a second marriage simply because it may feel comfortable, or you hate to be alone. Take this time to love who you are and really understand what you want in a mate. Learn what you will not “settle” for, what you will not tolerate, and make smart decisions the second time around. This will not only make for a happier second marriage, but one that will last.
So take reflective time before leaping into that second marriage. Be patient and gain a better understanding of yourself before looking for another mate.
By Tammy Moorehead, CHHP for the 50 Plus Report